Girl dating an older guy
I romanticized a story about an adult man kidnapping, molesting, and raping an adolescent girl.None of that stuff happened to me, but I still wince when I remember how I idealized the thought of someone being single-mindedly obsessed with me the way the novel’s narrator is with Lolita.By Amy Rose Spiegel One of the most frequent Just Wondering questions we get here at Rookie is some variation on the following: “I’m a teenager and I’m thinking about dating/am intensely attracted to a person who’s significantly older than me. ” Well, as someone who not only has always been interested in older dudes, but has also dated quite a few of them, I have some things to say about your situation, question-askers.When I was 15, I was dating a 28-year-old (cue gasping).
But you’re in luck — she’s going to be attracted to you before you even open your mouth. It’s going to end eventually, so don’t talk about a relationship with her. Don’t talk about your feelings and emotions and how you’re falling for her unless she does it first. She’s looking to enjoy herself because most of the men in her age range are not in the physical shape she desires and are already broken and destroyed. In order to succeed, she probably had to be smarter than the men around her.
No matter how hot, smart, or successful she is, an older woman will always be afraid you’re going to leave her for a younger one.
It’s the one thing she can’t compete with, and she’s smart enough to know youth in women, by itself, is attractive.
Looking back at that relationship now, seven years later, there are so many things I wish someone had told me before I decided to become the Lolita to this guy’s Humbert².
That, by the way, is actually a comparison I made at the time, which is so gross to me now.
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I mean, I know: some cute college guy who spells his texts properly and actually seems to wash his face (be still my beating heart) can be pretty tough crush competition for the bros in your 10th grade math class.